Do You Say Thank You?

Caitlin Kelly’s post on her blog “Broadside”  titled “Saying Thank you” made me realize that I have been very lazy about that lately.  I sent a note to my friend Margaret after she housed me for a night at her home in San Francisco but it was quickly written and sloppy and while I had intended to send a personally written card to everyone that has hosted us for dinner over the past kitchenless year I am ashamed to admit that I justified merely sending an email thanks with “everyone does it this way now” or “people will understand how busy I am”.  Not.

I lost a friend once because I didn’t send a thank you note.  Ok, so she wasn’t that great of a friend and I was close to a nervous breakdown due to my one hundred hour per week work schedule but still, I could have sent a card.

My eighteen year old niece asked me a couple months ago if I wanted a thank you note after I sent her an Amazon gift card.  “Of course!”  I never believed in gift cards or giving cash, that was forbidden in my house as a gift must be thoughtful and purposeful, but that practice has gone by the wayside as the nieces and nephews now prefer them.  In return I receive handwritten and misspelled cards that melt my heart.

Karen J. Charlton mused on “People who don’t send birthday cards” on one of my favorite blogs The Rhythm Method  whether it was acceptable to send birthday cards not even at all but late.  I am guilty on that count as well.

A few years ago shortly after my birthday someone commented that they couldn’t believe how many cards I had received, proudly displayed on my living room coffee table.  “Well, that’s because I send them” was my reply.  Duh.  Although if I ever sent one to the recipient on time they’d most likely fall over in shock at their mail box.

I don’t receive as many birthday cards as I used to but I haven’t sent as many either.  Thanks to The Rhythm Method and Broadside that’s going to change.  And if you invite us to dinner, I promise to send a card.

How do you justify bad behavior?

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8 Responses to Do You Say Thank You?

  1. Dee Wood says:

    Love it, love it! I’m sending this to my daughters!! They feel like it’s fine to say a quick thanks by email (& hate to say that I endorsed it), but isn’t it soooooo much nicer to get an actual written note or card!?! For sure!!

  2. Good for you! I just bought even *more* lovely stationery a few days ago and plan to use it for thank-you notes. There are two REALLY easy things anyone can do to insure they always send proper notes: have a good supply of really attractive stationery (maybe personalized) or note cards on hand (I even take them with me when I travel), AND stamps. Then all it takes is five minutes and you have NO excuse not to do it.

    • I have a ton of beautiful cards, including personalized ones and keep some at my office so no, there really is no excuse. I used to write letters to my pen pal in Australia (we’ve been pals since we were kids) but now we have email and Facebook. It’s not the same.

  3. I love to receive cards, so this is why I try to make an effort to write them, although a text message or email thank you is welcome too (we’re all busy, after all).
    It’s nice to think that you’re doing something out of the kindness of your heart. As soon as it feels like an obligation, it loses its charm for me.

    • It is an obligation but that’s what “manners” is, right? If someone goes out of their way to do something nice for me I’d like to do a little something back. Something to strive for anyway…..

  4. Crystal says:

    Aw you did mention me!! Thanks 🙂 good entry today too. I agree with you on moving the fridge downstairs I mean really

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